Monday, April 18, 2011

Self Struggles

I'd hinted at some of my recent struggles and need to get back in my studio awhile ago in January. I've still unfortunately been struggling with personal issues and haven't been very productive lately, nor have I felt very sociable in regards to either exhibiting my own art or in showing my support for other artists by attending their shows. I've just withdrawn from life overall.

I have never overcome adversity or dealt with criticism well, which is part of why I've learned to detach in my work. But that detachment is not serving me as well right now, and I am finding myself drawn to making more personal work again. I feel like I'm just on the brink of emerging out from under everything that has gotten me down, and I have actually started to work on art for the first time in months. Nothing big, though some hefty ideas are brewing and in the works, but mostly things I'd left unfinished or little things to get my feet wet again for right now.

I'm planning to participate in the plein air event in Augusta again this year (weather permitting) and I think this will help me get back into the swing of production again. I feel it will do me a lot of good to get away and focus on painting for the next couple weeks, for all that the things I plan to pursue after Augusta are of a totally different nature than my decorative little plein air paintings.

I am starting to formulate some of my thoughts and struggles from the fall into my art, as seen in the recent Barbie project. I think that my resulting work will be much more personal for all that it will still have strong social undertones and be rather direct. (That is just my nature regardless of what I'm making.) So keep an eye out after I get back from Augusta. I hope to make some new work and to be more involved in my art and life again and to overcome the self doubts and insecurities that have plagued me since fall.

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