Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Day 12 in the Box

Thank you Ciera Stewart for photographing my piece today. I am still tired from not sleeping well but have been unable to sleep much during the performance. Instead, I finished Perfect Girls, Starving Daughters. I was visited by several people whom had seen me before and were surprised that I was still doing my performance after the break, including the student who has stopped in frequently in the past to check up on me. It is nice to see people coming back to see if I'm alright or am still there, whether out of curiosity (is that girl still in the box?) or out of genuine concern.

In regards to my physical shape, I still am not feeling great for all that I'm not sick. I think mostly it's due to allergies from the season change and me not sleeping well due to a combination of factors: allergies (again), stress, my neck and back aching from the performance, watching things I need to contend with pile up waiting for me to deal with them later on, wondering when I'll get a break after this in the midst of all of the backlog... Meanwhile, I am running into greater frustrations in regards to some things I have had to put on hold for the piece (financial matters and such), which is making it harder not to get depressed, especially with some of these things becoming needlessly overcomplicated and further draining my time and mood beyond the cage.

I am also becoming more and more aware of the toll that this is taking on my life as a whole with as many people as have been emailing me lately wondering why I've dropped off the face of the earth and why I am not responding to them. (During the week off, I really did begin to understand just how trapped I have let myself become by my computer habits, though, so they'll have to deal with waiting or get over it while I take more time for myself, even after this performance is ended.) I am having to postpone more and more things until after the performance. I am uncertain that I will be able to get to all of them in a timely manner, although I also question just how important many of them really are. So if you're waiting on me for anything be patient and try to remember what I've been doing lately, why I haven't had the time to get to it and may not do so for awhile still.

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